Ah, that would make sense. He's not as close to Sebastian as he wants to be, but he does know something something kill everyone in this room and then himself, as far as Sebastian and His Boy goes.
He nests in the hug, thinking this must be how cozy metal feels when it starts to melt in a flame. And he agrees with her. He does. But there's an odd resistance in his heart to a world where he never got very literally broken.
"I think... I think I needed it, truthfully. I needed that, to understand death better as a consequence. When I got here, almost the first thing I did was kill Arthur. Made him fall down some stairs and break his neck. I knew I won. But I didn't really... understand what that would have done to someone in a world without the Admiral bringing us back. I didn't care that death hurt the living, even if the dead came back."
"...Death never taught me anything." It was just more pain, more helplessness, more of her life stolen, more reason to resent the world and all of its heroes. All those hard-won miracles and lofty ideals.
"That's half of why the Barge is such a clusterfuck. All of us needing wildly different things." She's not benevolent enough to grant the Admiral more than that. "...Anyone caught you up to speed on Trevor's bullshit?"
"I wouldn't say death taught you nothing," Edwin counters quietly. "I think it taught you that the world isn't the fair, just place that the people who win, the people who live, decide that it is when they're rewarded by the chaos of unpredictability."
His turn to take the lead on hugging. He resettles his arms around around Maddie. Arms, shadows, the folds of a blanket that wasn't there a few seconds ago. "I think death taught you that and they taught you to be angry about the lie."
It's still odd, trusting someone so absolutely - so much that she can sink into a new sensation without flinching, without assuming the worst. Maybe accepting that comfort means she can receive the words, too, a little more easily.
Before it became one of the last desperate sanctuaries, her Embassy was for mutants who didn't fit in Krakoa; the ones who never had the luxury of dreams. Would she have known the importance of that if she hadn't been failed so utterly, over and over?
"He got himself demoted, after an earlier killing spree. Now he wants to wreck the whole ship." She doesn't sound worried about it. "...I've met a lot of people who hate themselves, but still think they're doing what's best for everyone else."
There are the ones she has no respect or sympathy for, like Xavier. But then - well, then there's her son.
"Some things you do have to burn down and start over."
Again he doesn't disagree. Though he's strangely disappointed in Trevor, and he can't figure out yet why. It'll keep. He has more than enough to think about already.
"Ashes denote that fire was; Respect the grayest pile For the departed creature’s sake That hovered there awhile. Fire exists the first in light, And then consolidates,— Only the chemist can disclose Into what carbonates."
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2025-12-20 05:27 am (UTC)He nests in the hug, thinking this must be how cozy metal feels when it starts to melt in a flame. And he agrees with her. He does. But there's an odd resistance in his heart to a world where he never got very literally broken.
"I think... I think I needed it, truthfully. I needed that, to understand death better as a consequence. When I got here, almost the first thing I did was kill Arthur. Made him fall down some stairs and break his neck. I knew I won. But I didn't really... understand what that would have done to someone in a world without the Admiral bringing us back. I didn't care that death hurt the living, even if the dead came back."
no subject
Date: 2025-12-20 07:35 am (UTC)"That's half of why the Barge is such a clusterfuck. All of us needing wildly different things." She's not benevolent enough to grant the Admiral more than that. "...Anyone caught you up to speed on Trevor's bullshit?"
no subject
Date: 2025-12-20 02:51 pm (UTC)His turn to take the lead on hugging. He resettles his arms around around Maddie. Arms, shadows, the folds of a blanket that wasn't there a few seconds ago. "I think death taught you that and they taught you to be angry about the lie."
...Uh oh. "What happened?"
He hasn't really seen Trevor much lately yet.
no subject
Date: 2025-12-22 12:33 am (UTC)Before it became one of the last desperate sanctuaries, her Embassy was for mutants who didn't fit in Krakoa; the ones who never had the luxury of dreams. Would she have known the importance of that if she hadn't been failed so utterly, over and over?
"He got himself demoted, after an earlier killing spree. Now he wants to wreck the whole ship." She doesn't sound worried about it. "...I've met a lot of people who hate themselves, but still think they're doing what's best for everyone else."
There are the ones she has no respect or sympathy for, like Xavier. But then - well, then there's her son.
"Some things you do have to burn down and start over."
no subject
Date: 2025-12-22 02:01 am (UTC)"Ashes denote that fire was;
Respect the grayest pile
For the departed creature’s sake
That hovered there awhile.
Fire exists the first in light,
And then consolidates,—
Only the chemist can disclose
Into what carbonates."